Sucker Punch-- A Review

I was genuinely excited about this movie. Zack Snyder, I thought, was on a roll. He had done '300' (awesome movie) followed it up with 'Watchmen' (another awesome movie) and when I saw the previews for 'Sucker Punch' I was genuinely excited. This was a movie I was convinced was going to kick major ass and take major names and generally continue the trend of Zack Snyder being on a tear.

Alas, all good things must come to an end and with this movie, Snyder apparently aimed to overdose on awesome and blow everybody's face clean off and instead ended up with an overdone turd of a movie that is little more than hyper-kinectic action porn aimed squarely at 12 year old boys.

This is a movie that has no idea what it wants to be. Don't get me wrong: there are movies out there that can bend reality with the best of them and actually leave you guessing as to what might be going on. 'Sucker Punch' does not do that- not by a long shot. Instead, we're treated to the story of Babydoll (Emily Browning) who after attacking her sexually abusive stepfather after he murders her sister gets sent to an insane asylum instead. Learning that she only has five days before the Doctor comes to lobotomize her (with an icepick, pretty much. Really? Do they still do icepick lobotomies?) She constructs an elaborate fantasy in her mind aimed at helping her and her fellow inmates escape. To make a bloated, messy, overburdened, lazy plotline short, she ends up lobotomized, the evil abusive head nurse who sets up these needless lobotomies gets found out and one- only one of the other inmates Sweet Pea (Abbie Cornish) actually makes her way to freedom.

For a trainwreck of a movie though, there's a surprising amount of talent hidden away in this movie. Joining Browning and Cornish are Jamie Chung, Vanessa Hudgens and Jena Malone as the other inmates (I totally had to do a double take on Hudgens, but sure enough, there she was. And she was pretty good at kicking ass in this ridiculous movie. There might have even been some acting ability in there as well.) Carla Gugino plays Dr. Gorski, the asylum's head psychiatrist- but it's Scott Glenn (badass!) who steals the show as the Wise Man who guides Baby Doll through her fantasies. Glenn pretty much makes the movie bearable, because, you know, he's Scott Glenn (one of those actors where you see him and go... 'Oh! THAT GUY!') and his character pops up in random places to whip out pithy quotes like 'Don't write a check with your mouth that you can't cash with your ass' in a gravelly, wise voice. Basically, it was awesome to see him in a movie again! We need more Scott Glenn, I think. (Oh and Jon Hamm was in this as well. Because Jon Hamm seems to be in EVERYTHING these days.)

Overall: * out of **** not even the actors can save this turd of a movie. But Scott Glenn continues to kick ass.