This Week In Vexillology #48

This week, we're hopping on the Orient Express and taking the night train to Istanbul because this week in vexillology, we've got Turkey!

Adopted for national and civil usage on June 5th, 1936, the current flag bears some resemblance to flags that date as early as the 17th Century under the Ottoman Empire.  However, following Turkey's defeat in the First World War when Ataturk deposed the Sultan and declared a Republic, all emblems and symbols were destroyed and the flag became the main symbol of the new Republic.

The star and the crescent are both common symbols of Islam and are always placed slightly towards the hoistof the flag.  One point of the star touches the invisble line that joins the two horns of the crescent moon.   The star has undergone an interesting evolution over the years- first appearing on Ottoman flags as far back as 1793 with eight points before usually having five points by the early 19th Century.  By 1936, it had assumed it's present form and position on the flag.

So put your hands together for Turkey!  And remember, until next time keep your flags flying- FREAK or otherwise!

Food Adventures #31: Crockpot Orange Chicken

I love Chinese food.  Occasionally, you just have to go bananas and order a smorgasbord of delicious Chinese takeout and drink wine and eat crab rangoons until you're so full you can't move and ultimately end up regretting it in the morning because you've eaten so much food, you're still uncomfortable the next day.

Problem is, I have a sneaking suspicion that Chinese food isn't necessarily the healthiest food around which is why I've long been intrigued at the possibility of crockpot orange chicken. A simple Google search lead me over here to a recipe.  It seemed pretty simple, so I got the basic ingredients and gave it a go.   What we started with was this:

I'll be honest, kids- I was a little dubious going into this.  The sauce (which has 3 tablespoons of ketchup) smelled more like ketchup than anything orange.  If you go to the link above to check out the recipe- it didn't end up looking like that, which made me worried that I hadn't browned the chicken long enough.  (I started this in the morning, so it had all day to cook and the recipe says not to cook it all the way because the crockpot will finish it for you.)  But I stuck with it- and good thing to, because this resulted:

No, it didn't look like the picture in the recipe but it smelled like orange chicken and it sure as hell tasted like orange chicken.  Oh, and what's that we had with it?  The Missus cooked up some fried rice:

(She's a big fan of how-to videos on YouTube, so that's where she got her recipe.  A simple YouTube search and you have thousands of options at your fingertips.)  She had made this recipe before and although she forgot the egg this time around and the rice was stickier than it was the first time, it was still amazingly delicious.

My Verdict:  I've snagged a recipe for General Tso's Crockpot Chicken that I might trot out next month- but between the Missus and her fried rice and a couple of trusty crockpot recipes, we're one batch of wontons away from never having to order takeout again.  Unless we feel like it.

Shutdown Roulette

I've been avoiding the news lately.  The farcical clusterfu*kery of the way this administration handled the red line that they themselves drew on Syria was just depressing.  The fact the Russian President Vladimir Putin ran an op-ed in the New York Times to twist the knife in a little more didn't exactly comfort me.  I'm becoming increasingly convinced that no one in Washington has any idea what's actually going on or how to do their damn jobs.   But that's way it's always been and that's the way it's probably going to remain.

So why worry about it, right?  To be honest, The Dan Patrick Show is a far more entertaining and much less heartburn inducing way to start my day.  The snark of Deadspin or the witticisms of Grantland are better uses of my time than Sarah Palin's umpteenth column on how Obamacare is bad, etc, etc, etc.  But the latest round of shutdown roulette has me thinking:  what are the Republicans actually doing?

Let's consider:  they don't like Obamacare.  But neither do a lot of other people out there for reasons both rational and irrational  Employers are cutting hours to avoid the mandates in the bill.   They're rolling back benefit packages.  Young people are getting hosed.  There's a storm of bad news coming and all it seems the House of Representative wants to do is hold bimonthly votes repealing and/or defunding Obamacare.

Why?  I haven't the faintest idea.  It's starting to get irritating really.  I mean, they know that it's not going to go anywhere.  Even if a dozen Democratic senators suffer strokes/head injuries of some kind and actually vote to defund Obamacare, I doubt the President will sign it into law and I doubt even more that both House and Senate can muster the votes for a veto override.  So it's a non-starter.  They know that.  The Democrats know that.  The American people know that.  Small furry woodland creatures living high in the Rocky Mountains know that.  We get it already, you don't like Obamacare.

But shutting down the government?  Eeeeeesh.  I'm not convinced by that.  (And understand that this comes from neither love of GOPers or love of Democrats.  I just like it when people on both sides play smart politics.  This doesn't feel like one of those times though.)  If your opponent is constantly shooting themselves in the foot, why are you asking him to borrow his gun so you can have a turn?  It would be an extreme move.  It would be a risky move.  And it's entirely possible that it would explode right in the faces of the GOPers that think they're being soooooooo clever and standing on principle.  Conservatives all over the interwebbles have been insisting that this is going to be a trainwreck- like we're talking the one in The Fugitive bad.  Assuming they're right, then why try to stop it?  Let it happen.  The Democrats and the President will be left holding the bag just in time for 2014 and the hangover will last all the way to 2016.  That's nothing but good news for the GOPers.

But the danger then becomes, what if they're wrong?  What if it actually starts to work a little bit- the initial roll out pains/bugs get worked out of the system and it starts doing some good?  While I applaud the Republicans for finally introducing their alternative bill, that's something we should have seen in 2010.  Then the American people would have been beneficiaries of an actual debate on health care.  Instead, you're left with the impression that the Republicans seem to think that putting your hands over your ears and going 'na na na nananananana, I can't heaaaaaaaar you' is good public policy.

The alternative could be a sensible one:  make it better.  Work with the President and the Democrats and present revisions and endless repeals and defunding.  Decentralize any power in the bill away from Washington.  Make sure it empowers individual people to make choices that work for them.  Make sure employers don't screw over their employees in a hasty attempt to conform to endless minutia and regulations.  Strip out all the pork and backdoor sweetheart deals and actually find out what's in the damn bill and make sure it doesn't suck out loud anymore.   That would be good public policy...

That has a snowball's chance in hell of actually happening.   So it will be interesting, as the Republican Party stares down the President, revolver in hand, barrel whirling away as they ready themselves for the next round of shutdown roulette.  Problem is, if you play roulette too many times, sooner or later, you get the chamber with the bullet inside.

Iowa v Western Michigan: et spes est in aere tenui odor

It was a long, slow day Saturday.  I picked up some overtime at work and spent the game working the cameras at Kinnick but with only four arrests, I wasn't really kept all that busy and as a result actually managed to view a decent portion of the game itself- with better much better picture quality and zoom features than any of you could possibly imagine.  But, to brass tacks:

First of all, 59-3!  Let's say that again and savor the taste of those numbers as they roll off of the tongue.  59-3.   Granted, it comes against a woeful Western Michigan team which takes the shine off of the decimation just a bit but it's been a long time since we've managed to put up numbers like that against anyone.  In fact, the last time we came that close was a 62-10 beatdown of Northwestern in 2002 and given the fact our record against Western Michigan under Ferentz was an equally woeful 0-2, I'll take the beatdown.  It was a pleasant surprise.

Second of all, Kevonte Martin-Manley.   Question:  when was the last time you can recall an Iowa player running anything back for a touchdown?  Especially punts.  Go on, I'll give you a minute to think about it...  yeah, that's what I said as well. 2 in one game is just insane...  in fact, Martin-Manley was the first B1G this century to do it- he's the third to do it overall and the first since 1983.  30 years ago.  But wait, it gets better:  with 183 yards in punt returns, Martin-Manley got a sniff at the school record for punt returns set in a single game, 201 yards set by the man himself, Nile Kinnick way back in 1939.

Third of all, back-ups!  Our back-ups got some playing time including our back up QB Beathard who wasn't all that bad either.  I doubt we'll get many more chances to get them involved in games so it was nice and sensible to see that happen- along with some good, solid practice at refining our passing game a little bit before heading into B1G play next week against Minnesota.

So, we're 3-1 heading into conference play.   Not bad.  Not bad at all though I'll take this with a large grain of salt.  After all, Northern Illinois is genuinely good.   Missouri State and Western Michigan not so much and I'm not sure what kind of year Iowa State is going to have but it's probably not going to be a good one.  There remains a large possibility that this could be the high point of our season.  It could be all downhill from here and we could just go tits up and wander into mediocrity like we did last year.  There will be rending of garments, tearing of hair and fists will be shaken at Ferentz and Gary Barta for mortgaging the kidnies of the Athletic Department with that insane buyout clause.

And yet...  conference play looks a lot less scary than it did at the start of the season.   Our defense is playing on a high level.  Our O-line looks solid.  Rudock looks solid and has a chance to be very effective at quarterback for us.  Things are trending in the right direction, I think and it's been awhile since anyone's been able to definitively say that.

The Legends Division looks interesting now.  Maybe even manageable. Minnesota is trending upwards but still rebuilding.  Nebraska is having all kinds of defensive issues.  Michigan State seems to have caught a bad case of our offensive troubles from last year.  Even Michigan looks mortal- UCONN and Akron gave them fits even though they came away with wins both times.   The only team that looks doubtful is Northwestern but we get them at home this year.

The rest of our schedule?  I think we have genuine shots to get wins against Minnesota, Michigan State and Purdue. Wisconsin, Michigan and Nebraska could be tough- the latter far more than the former as we have to play them in Lincoln this year but we could beat at least one, maybe two out of that trio.   Northwestern and Ohio State will be insanely tough indeed and while I'll hold out hope for a miracle, I think we can file both of those teams under 'miracle' and call it could.

Like I said though, there's an equally large chance everything could go south on us and disaster could ensue, but right now, for the first time in a long time, et spes est in aere tenui odor:  the faint smell of hope is in the air.

Food Adventures #30: PB and J Popcorn

Tip of the hat to Buzzfeed for including this recipe on a 30 Awesome Things You Can Cook In September list or something like that- though the actual recipe comes from Something Swanky over here.   I liked this idea immediately:  after all, you're taking popcorn and elevating to something other than plain old popcorn and you're doing so without pour half a gallon of butter and salt on top of it.  (Though I appreciate some of the 'flavored seasonings' like the ranch or cheese dust or whatever, it's essentially, flavored salt.  Though delicious, delicious flavored salt.   And don't even get me started on caramel corn.)

Anyway:  I had peanut butter, I had jelly and I snagged some popcorn and away we went.  This resulted:

And you know what?  It's pretty damn good.   The Missus even suggested making this into popcorn balls come Christmas time and I agree with her but with one, tiny, revision:  I grabbed the first white chocolate chips I saw and they happened to have vanilla flavoring onboard.   None of it tasted bad but the vanilla in the chips pushed the PB and J to the background a little bit, so be aware of that when you make this stuff.  (The recipe also calls for Welch's All Natural Grape Jelly.  I just used whatever was in our squeeze bottle in the fridge.   The All Natural Stuff, could, I suppose, have a stronger grape flavor but really, is it worth the extra two bucks or so they probably tack on to the price just so they can call it 'All Natural?'  Probably not.

My Verdict:  If you're tired of plain old popcorn and want something nice, easy and simple to jazz it up with- try this.  Took me less than half an hour total, if that.

This Week In Vexillology #47

I've been putting this off for far too long but randomly, I'm going to return to the Motherland so buckle up, pour yourself a nice cup of tea because this week in vexillology, we're heading over to the United Kingdom!

First of all let's correct a common mistake:  if you happen to be flying this flag on the ocean then it's the Union Jack.  On land, its known as the Union Flag.   And here's the other interesting thing:  technically, the Union Flag remains a royal flag, so the right of British subjects to fly it on land must be granted by royal permission.  But I'm not sure how much attention is paid to that particular rule anymore.

The current form of the flag was adopted n January 1st, 1801 for national and civil usage.  The central red cross fimbriated with white was adapted from St. George's Cross, taken from the flag of England.  The white saltire on a blue field was taken from St. Andrew's Cross, which is the flag of Scotland.   The saltire of St. Patrick (which is the red diagonal cross) is counter-changed on the white saltire of St. Andrew represents Ireland- in this case, the Northern Ireland.

Basically, when King James of Scotland became King of England as well in 1603, both countries retained their own flags and even today, St. George's Cross and St. Andrew's Cross are flown in their respective countries.   But in 1606, King James wanted a new flag for the new union of the two countries and so they combined them and made the Union Flag.   In 1801, Ireland joined the United Kingdom and St. Patrick's Cross was added to the flag.  (And that represented all of Ireland until 1921, when the south broke away to form first the Irish Free State and then the Republic of Ireland.)

So there you have it- put your hands together for the United Kingdom!  And remember until next time, keep your flags flying- FREAK or otherwise!

Instagram Food Wars: Mall Madness

Yes, it's the triumphant return of Instagram Food Wars!   There's been a veritable explosion of dining options just upstairs from my work at 'The Bunker.'  (Yes, I work in a windowless room somewhere in the basement of the Old Capitol Mall- it's a lot less glamorous than it sounds.)  Needless to say, given the unpredictable nature of my job (things can go bananas at the drop of a hat) we're sort of confined to the mall upstairs for caffeine, sugar, food and dining options and since there's been a few new additions, I thought I'd send the two newbies head to head and see what results.

First up, Sparti's Express:

First of all:  can I just say how awesome it is to get a genuinely good replacement for Sam's Caboose Burgers or whatever it was.  (Seriously:  I'm all for trying something new but I gave that place plenty of chances and it just didn't do it for me.  No offense to peeps that liked it, I just, well, didn't.)

Second of all:  They make a good gyro up at Sparti's Express.  I don't know if it rises to the level of Oasis Falafel but it certainly beats out Zaika (now Wraps N'Rolls), Pita Pit and George's Best Gyros in the Ped Mall.  (I have to give them another go. The Missus and I tried them a couple of weeks back when we were downtown for the Hispanic Festival and they didn't taste as good as I remember. Which means that either the quality has dropped, he was having an off day or they just taste awesome when you're drunk.  I suspect option number three- though I'd like to find out for sure.  I have fond memories of that gyro cart.)

The Verdict:  This is good shit.  Although I'm being a good boy these days and bringing food from home (most of the time) Sparti's will be a nice option to have if I crave it.  Plus, their Greek fries are AMAZEBALLS and THEY HAVE MAC N'CHEESE BITES.


Next up, Pizza Bros:

I was a little bummed out when Sbarro's closed as it had been there for years but at the same time, I wasn't all that surprised either.  When I was in junior high/high school, Sbarro's was awesome.  Thick, juicy, huge slices--  I don't know what happened.   Either I tend to notice grease the older I get or something went off the rails towards the end because it just wasn't as good as it once was.   Enter, Pizza Bros.

This is kind of a novel concept.  You pick a dough size (8 inch, 10 inch), step up to a condiment bar full of ingredients and sauces and all that good stuff.  You load up, pay by the ounce and three minutes later you're on your way.  It's efficient and at 45 cents an oz, it's pretty damn cheap.

The Verdict:  Meeeeeeeh.   It's an interesting concept but I wonder about it's staying power.  Plus, I'm not sure how I feel about all the ingredients just sitting out there in the open.  Some of them looked a bit dubious to me- but, I can assemble and make a good pizza!  Yet, curiously, I could also do the exact same thing, myself, at home.  

The Winner:  Sparti's Express.   THEY HAVE MAC N'CHEESE BITES.  And mac n'cheese bites will get you a win, EVERY SINGLE TIME.

'The Trip' --A Review

The second half of our Netflix Double Feature last Saturday, The Trip (which I guess was a television show that was edited into a movie?  What?) is a movie that I had been wanting to sit down and watch for quite awhile- if for no other reason than watching Steve Coogan and Rob Brydon bounce competing impressions off of each other is a LOL-tastic good time.  (Their competing Michael Caine impressions alone make this worth watching- but please, stay and catch Coogan's Roger Moore- it's comedic perfection at it's best.)

Michael Winterbottom directs the pair in what I guess is a sort of sequel to A Cock and Bull Story- a movie which I have heard about but never seen.  Both play fictionalized versions of themselves:  Coogan, in an attempt to impress his American girlfriend Mischa, accepts a job from The Observer touring the best restaurants of Northern England to review them.   When Mischa decides to take a break from their relationship and go to America to work for awhile, Coogan is forced to seek an alternative travelling companion, eventually hitting up Brydon.

Together, the two of them present interest contrasts.  Brydon has a loving wife and child, a comfortably middle class existence and seems (at least outwardly) to be content with his lot in life.  Coogan, on the other hand, presents himself as a deeply melancholy and unhappy man, trying to break into more serious roles and failing.  His relationship on the rocks, he spends most of their trip (when they're not sparring over Wordsworth, Coleridge and who does the better Michael Caine impression) sleeping with various women they meet along the way and arguing with his agents about roles he might be about to get.

There's really not much more to this movie than that:  food and driving across the gorgeous landscapes of Northern England with comedy and verbal sparring throughout.  I think was surprised me the most was the undercurrent of melancholy that Coogan presents.   You can't help but feel sorry for the guy:  I mean, he's successful but doesn't feel that he's been successful enough.  He's well known on television but craves the big, Hollywood lifestyle-  he's got tons but it's not enough.  In contrast to this, Brydon has a more modest but ultimately more fulfilling existence.  He's got a wife that loves him and a new baby as well but the stark contrast between the two hits home at the very end when Brydon arrives home to light and warmth and Coogan arrives home to his empty but glamorous penthouse where he calls his agent and turns down the lead role in a major drama on US television- he wants to stay closer to his kids.

Overall:  This movie made me want to move to England.   The Missus actually did a Google search about getting nursing jobs over there and it turns out it's kind of a pain in the ass so we decided to settle for the occasional vacation- when and if we can ever afford it again.   The Lake District and the Peak District just looked fantastic and gorgeous and I was craving a proper English Breakfast so badly by the end of it.  And it didn't help that Coogan and Brydon were funny as hell throughout this movie either.   Amazing stuff- might have to look up A Cock and Bull Story and check that out and Wikipedia says they're making a sequel!  A Trip To Italy!   That should be fun.  My verdict: **** out of ****

'Struck By Lightning' --A Review

We got back from Omaha on Saturday just in time to catch the end of the Iowa-Iowa State game (a welcome if slightly nervy victory from the Hawkeyes- especially toward the end) and with The Cigarillo safely exhausted and sleeping in bed, the Missus and I decided to have an impromptu Netflix Double Feature and after some browsing, we settled on Struck By Lightning as our first choice.

Struck By Lightning is the story of Carson Phillips (Chris Colfer) who is a writer and aspiring journalist, trying to get into Northwestern so he can someday be editor of The New Yorker.  (What is it about The New Yorker that inspires such fanatical devotion? I haven't figured it out yet.)  Growing up in a small town in California named Clover, Carson and his friend Malerie (Rebel Wilson) struggle to attract enough interest to put out a school newspaper- all while Carson takes care of his mother (Allison Janney) a divorcee, who seems intent on drinking as much as possible while desperately hoping that Carson doesn't leave home to go to college, leaving her with just Carson's Grandmother (Polly Bergen) who has Alzheimer's to take care of.

When his guidance counselor tells him that in order to get into Northwestern, being President of The Writer's Club or Editor of the school newspaper won't be enough, Carson eventually hits on the idea of starting a literary magazine- that way he can show how he inspires people to write.  When his call for voluntary submissions is spurned, however, he and Malerie soon hit on a way of getting a literary magazine they can publish: blackmail.

Yes, blackmail:  Carson gets dirt on the powerful and popular at school including head cheerleader Claire (Sarah Hyland) who is sleeping with the Head Coach of the football team (Charlie Finn).  This lands him submissions from all the cheerleaders and football players.  He tricks the Yearbook Editor Remy Baker (Allie Grant) into sending him a dirty picture of herself.  He threatens to out the President of the Drama Club (Graham Rodgers) and the popular rich kid (Nicholas Forbes) unless they contribute to the paper and write for the magazine.   Goth girl Vicki (Ashley Rickards) gets hooked via some BDSM-style pictures her religious parents wouldn't approve of.  The school pothead (Matt Prokop) drops his pot and in an unusual twist, Carson and Malerie discover that the foreign exchange student Emilio (Robert Aguire) is actually from San Diego and hardly knows any Spanish at all, so he too gets hooked into the literary magazine.

Unfortunately, just when things start going right, they all fall apart for Carson.   His father (Dermot Mulroney) has a new fiancee (Christina Hendricks) and they're going to have a baby and their attempt at a reconciliation does not go well.   He does get accepted into Northwestern but discovers that since he didn't get a letter in the mail, he didn't confirm so he has to wait two years to re-apply.  Which would be bad enough except it turns out his mother hid the letter because she didn't want him to leave.  And to top it all off:  the literary magazine is a flop thanks to a student backlash against him.

Despite all that, Carson decides that maybe the one story he has left to write is his own and since he actually got students to submit to his literary magazine maybe he's actually happy for once.  He walks outside into the rumble of thunder where he gets struck by lightning and killed.

No really, that's what happens.  Except it happens at the beginning- so this whole thing is a flashback.  BOOM!  Didn't see that coming, didja?

Overall:  This is a brilliant screenwriting debut for Chris Colfer.  The cast is outstanding- you'll recognize pretty much everyone from something or another that you've seen and the story while it threatens to wander into typical high school tropes provides a fresh and original twist by structuring itself as a flashback, given Carson, the unseen (and dead) narrator a chance to see the impression he made on everybody's life.  My verdict:  **** out of ****

T. Boone Pickens Is Either Crying Or Hoppin' Mad

Last week, Sports Illustrated began a five part, exhaustive piece on allegations of shenanigans infecting the football program at Oklahoma State- money, drugs and sex featured prominently and the sports media was abuzz with a juicy new scandal to delve in to.  (The saving grace of this being that they can all stop talking about what new fucked up thing Johnny Manziel did today.)

Deadspin was unimpressed but made mention of the fact that one-time Fox Sports contributor (now back with ESPN) Jason Whitlock was less than impressed with one of the authors of the investigation, Thayer Evans.   ESPN mentioned it but seemed to stick with just a straight journalistic take on it (and even the comments weren't all that interesting like they usually are.  The comments on Part I of the SI piece, however were the usual 'frothing at the mouth, tin-foil hat wearing' type of stuff you usually expect.)

I can't say I'm all that surprised.   At the very least, this is only going to add to the debate over whether or not college payers should be paid. (Time recently did this big, splashy piece on the topic and promptly stuck it behind a paywall, the bastards.)  I tend to lean towards no- though I'm in favor of some form of increased stipend (I saw a Daily Show piece on this story which emphasizes the bullshit rules that penalize players unfairly), there's no way they should be penalized for pursuing interests other than sports and making money off of it.  These players- all of them, should control their names, images and likenesses and should be given a cut of any profits their schools and/or the NCAA makes off of them- but after they graduate.  I divvied up my reaction by parts:

PART 1:  The sham jobs bug me.  The actual jobs don't.  I mean, if some rich old lady wants to pay you $700 bucks to take a Christmas tree out of your attic, then that's on her.  As long as some actually labor is done then the compensation, especially for things like yard work and odd jobs around the house (which, traditionally, you don't hire out for- you usally pay a neighbor kid for) are usually decided by mutual agreement between the people that want the job done and the person doing the job. The sham jobs however, seem shady as hell.

The $500 dollar handshakes in the locker room after games?  Again- are we really surprised? Meh...  if true, that's bad.  Not surprising and probably more endemic than we'd like to admit.

P.S.  If you were wondering, T. Boone Pickens seems to be leaning towards the 'hoppin' mad' end of the things.

PART 2:  I don't think it's much of a secret that football players have access to all the resources in the world to help them make the grades to play football and maintain their scholarships.  That some programs have higher standards than others is also no secret.  But whether this is a symptom of something sinister or just a reflection the declining academic standards in higher education as a whole remains unclear.  I'm also getting a little dubious about this.  The authors of this thing keep naming names and those names they keep naming keep denying everything.   To their credit, they've got other former players that speak up and claims that some players were 'functionally illiterate' are disturbing.

But let's say this is on the level, though: how much revenue does a successful football program bring to a University as a whole?  If the answer to that question is 'a lot' then there's your answer about faculty looking the other way for football players.   Money pays their bills too.  So thus far: Oklahoma State could probably raise their academic standards a bit and rich boosters paid players to re-arrange paper clips, fish in their ponds and other frivolous things.  I'm sort of unimpressed.

P.S. (Former OSU QB Josh Fields went on The Dan Patrick Show and denied everything.  Patrick did a pretty good job of interviewing him as well and he seemed totally believable and on the level.)

PART 3:  Ah, so now Sports Illustrated is clutching their pearls in horror at the allegations that college students smoked weed.  (Gasp!  Shock!  Horror!  Not...  the reefer!)  The general thesis of this now exhausting series of article seems to be that Oklahoma State went from cellar dweller to conference power through shady means of some kind.  If Sports Illustrated had evidence of OSU say, juicing their players or using other performance enhancing drugs to get ahead that would be an actual story.   Bunch of players smoking weed?  Meh.  Again, it's not something we should be surprised about.  And if anyone has any evidence that smoking a blunt somehow increases athletic stamina and performance, please, let me know.

The vast majority of the alleged drug use seems to involve weed.  There was some cocaine, some codeine/xanax/hydracodone but nothing that would seem to give OSU players an advantage during their meteoric rise to the cream of the Big 12 Conference.  The reader is left with the impression that maybe OSU could be a bit more thorough in their drug screening and penalities but little more than that.  I'm still waiting to hear how this is an actual scandal and remain, unimpressed.

P.S.  The plot thickens!  ESPN actually did some good old fashioned journalism and found some documents that indicated inconsistencies with statements given to SI and nearly all the players quoted in the article are pissed off and walking their quotes back.  And it turns out that in Part 2 'THE ACADEMICS' they never actually bothered to talk to any actual academics.  Oops. The countdown until SI is forced to eat a shit sandwich over this story begins...  now.

PART 4:  College kids have sex!  Again, the quality of 'alert the media' and 'no shit, Sherlock' seem to hang over this expose and they can't quite shake them loose.   Do I think 'hostess' programs are anachronistic throwbacks tot he 1950s?  Yes.   But what bothered me most about this part was this quote:

"I was a student manager for the [wrestling] team in high school, and I remember how cool that felt to be part of a program. A lot of women's self-esteem is tied to the attention they receive from the opposite sex. If you are putting women in a position like that [with Orange Pride], even if the sex is voluntary, those women are still being taken advantage of."

There's something about this that bothered me but being a man, I wasn't quite sure if I had good reason to be bothered, so I read the Missus this quote and she agreed with me   Obviously, she doesn't speak for all woman-kind but this notion, to me, degrades women to little more than victims.  Can't a woman choose to have sex?  Nowhere in this article does it say that they were forced to or paid to have sex with recruits- they allegedly just did.  They did campus tours, went to parties, did what college kids do and BAM.  Sex.   It's not exactly unusual... Again, I'm left wondering what the problem is.   This thunderous, game-changing expose shouldn't be eye-opening to anyone.

P.S.  Another day, another piece of evidence added to the growing pile of 'this is a crock of badly written horseshit' that seems to be stacking up.

PART 5:  Redemption at last...  what happens to players that get cut from a football program?  Do they succeed, do they fail?  Oklahoma State has had players get cut that end up in some very bad places indeed- which, if this was expanded out to ask the question of football programs across the country instead of focusing just on one could be an amazing, compelling story indeed.   This one hit home- because a lot of these guys just didn't cut the mustard and got put on a bus back to where they came from.  Football was all they had- their shot for a better life and when it was taken away the results were devastating in many cases.

I'm still left wondering what the point of this was though.  It feels like the accusations on the Interwebs about Thayer Evans being a Sooner with an axe to grind have a point- why focus just on Oklahoma State so much?   If you're using them as an example for how broken the system really is, then fine- but it really does come across the reader like this is about taking them down more than fixing the obvious problems out there.  There's nothing particularly new or shocking here- at least to me but what I'm left with is the feeling that this was a hugely blown opportunity.   They could have done good, good work here reporting on the myriad of problems that people just shrug away in the name of football if they had just expanded their focus just a tiny bit.

Instead, it feels like they were picking on Oklahoma State, while the program may not be perfect, let's not act like they're any different from a lot of other programs out there.   Everyone can do better by student athletes and everyone should do better- but nowhere in this expose did that point get made.  What's the remedy?  What reforms are necessary going forward?  It would have been nice to know.

The Practical Guide To Entertaining The Cigarillo #3

Longfellow Elementary
(Suck it, Whitman!)

Pros:  The last time I was at Longfellow Elementary I was extremely drunk.  (The kind of drunk where you end up singing 'Midnight Train To Georgia' in somebody's house at about 1 in the morning, end up in a weird situation with her and her ex-boyfriend (I think her ex wanted to get some, she wasn't interested and I was just the random happy drunk dude in the corner)  in a hot tub and wake up the next morning on a couch without pants but thankfully with a towel.  Good times, good times.)  That alone endears this playground to me somewhat.   As an added bonus, they have a nice, extensive little kid set of playground equipment and a slide and a soccer field that the Little Man seemed to like pointing at a lot.

Cons:  There weren't many steep drops but the Cigarillo hasn't really gotten the hang of going down ladders yet.  He can heave himself up them just fine but his idea of getting down usually involves a stepping into the air and hoping that it'll all work out for the best.  (Which means, I have to catch him- again, he hasn't quite caught on to the ins and outs of gravity yet.)

Verdict: Close by, beautiful neighborhood with a wonderful playground.  Plus, the building itself has a great 'old school' feel to it.  Worth a visit!


Wickham Elementary
(The Hogwarts of Coralville)

Pros:  This was a truly pleasant surprise.  I hadn't planned on actually going to Wickham that day-  the Cigarillo likes a decent car ride so I was going to go and check it out and then maybe head over to Shimek or Lemme so he could play on those playgrounds but we ended up staying at Wickham.  Tucked away in the corner of the Muddy Creek Valley, the parking lot at the front of the school is well away from Oakdale Boulevard and the playground is just right there, open, inviting and friendly- no weird fences, no awkward walks around the building make you feel like an interloper. The whole place as a wonderful, neighborhood park type of feel to it and as a bonus, the playground was pretty damn awesome too- slides, bridges ups and downs.  The Cigarillo was a huge fan- and he even wanted to go for a stroll around the place when he was done and as it's right by the golf course, it was a pretty scenic- if a short walk.

Cons:  Topography.  Playground is down below by the school and the swings are up a hill above it- doesn't really make it seem all that big-  seems like two small playgrounds instead of one, complete playground.   Plus, I wasn't a fan of pushing the stroller up the long sidewalk that lead to the top of the hill.  (Plus there are a few drops on the playground-  you might have to monitor the smaller kiddos.)

Verdict: Make this a must visit if you're looking to shake things up on the playdate/playground circuit.   It's a good playground, friendly, open feel and even has a few trees if you want some shade to chill under while the kiddos play.

Bookshot #69: Those Guys Have All The Fun: Inside The World of ESPN

Why did I buy this book?  What was I expecting?  Having dragged my way through the seven hundred page tome chronicling the rise of ESPN to the cultural dominance that it enjoys today as well as the extensive backstage shenanigans that went along with it, I'm still not entirely sure.

The book seems to be billed as an oral history of sorts with plenty of ESPN insiders stepping forward to offer insight, tell stories and weave a fascinating chronicle of a network that really and truly helped give birth to the age of basic cable.  From it's beginnings as a humble experiment backed by (randomly) Getty Oil Money in 1979, Shales and Miller do a great job of showing us the early struggles and fights ESPN had to go through to establish itself as profitable and entrench itself in the cable market.  (ESPN fought for and eventually locked in the practice of charging cable companies subscription fees- something totally unheard of at the time but something that proved to be the foundation for ESPN's insane amount of profitability that continues to this day.)

The first chunk of the book was pretty boring, to be honest.  I'm not a journalism student and while, I suppose, the ins and outs of media management and a debate over who actually founded ESPN (something that seemed to come up randomly now and again for far too long) bored me, to be totally honest.  I was hoping for more stories from the reporters who covered the big sporting events from the early 80s but those didn't really start coming until they got around to the 90s and ESPN's breakthrough with the 1987 America's Cup.

Yachting.  Yes, yachting was a big hit for ESPN, I guess.  After that things get exciting for a bit before dipping back down to the middling.   Controversies about Keith Olberman and Dan Patrick and the launch of ESPN2 are interesting enough, I guess but again, sort of boring. By this point in the book, I was tired of hearing about ESPN's Rise To World Dominance, instead, I wanted to get together with Fox and NBC and launch a coup, Julius Ceaser style and go Brutus on ESPN just to get this damn book over with.

I'll admit, reluctantly that things did get a little towards the end.   Tony Kornheiser brings some good stories to the narrative and the struggles over Monday Night Football were fascinating (because I was totally oblivious to them at the time, though it sort of makes sense now.  Sunday Night Football seems to be billed as 'the bigger event.')  They also go into some pretty interesting details of the Erin Andrews stalking scandal as well as the many things said by a variety of ESPN stars (Kornheiser, Stephen A, Simmons, etc) that have gotten them suspended over the years.

Overall:  Apparently, I'm not as big of an ESPN fan as I thought I was because, to be honest, this book was kind of boring.  There's a vague sense of hagiography about it- especially with the whole 'Doing X, Y And Z: Step 10 in ESPN's Rise To World Dominance.'  I remain unconvinced about that- ESPN's East Coast bias has been discussed plenty and they give the SEC far too much love for my personal liking (though, I'll admit you can't argue with results) but I'd say unless you're a serious ESPN nut, don't bother reading this book.   And since I increasingly find myself watching Dan Patrick on the NBC Sports Network in the morning, I'm going to call this ** 1/2  out of **** and say that Shales and Miller did an impressive job assembling these interviews but they jump around a lot and a lot of it really isn't that interesting-at least to me.

This Week In Vexillology #46

Last week, we slipped north of the border to the Great White North and this week in vexillology, we're heading back down to South America and the Plurinational State of Bolivia!

Originally known as Upper Peru, Bolivia was named after one of South America's Great Liberators, Simon Bolivar who helped free the country from Spain in 1825.    The first flag of the country had three stripes of red, green and red with five gold stars within laurel wreaths which stood for the original five departments of the country.  In 1826, the flag was altered to three equal stripes of yellow, green and red with the arms of the country (more on them later) in the center.  The flag assumed it's present form on November 30th, 1851 when it was adapted for national and civil usage.  

The red in the flag recalls valor, the yellow Bolivia's mineral reserves and the green symbolizes fertility.   The red and the green were retained from the flag of 1825.  The official flag still has the arms of the country in the center:

Regulated in 1888, it depicts Mount Potosi, an alpaca, a wheatsheaft and a breadfruit tree.  (Together these represent the country's agricultural and industrial wealth.)  The flags and the weapons represent the people's willingness to defend the state- and because it's South America, the bird on the crest is a condor.   The oval ring contains the nine stars that represents Bolivia's nine departments.

But there's also another flag of Bolivia- established by the 2009 Constitution, the Wiphala:

The Wiphala is commonly used as the flag or emblem of all the native peoples of the Andes and hearkens back to the Incan Empire centuries ago.  There are several varieties of this emblem- and they vary depending on the old suyu or region of the Incan Empire they are meant to represent.  This one is the Wiphala of the Quila Suyu.

So now we have to get the one thing everybody's dying to know:  what the heck is up with the two capitals?  Well, basically, the Constitution recognized Sucre as the capital of Bolivia but because of it's relative remoteness and after the decline of the silver mining in Potosi, everybody moved to La Paz.  The 2009 Constitution continued to recognize Sucre as the capital of Bolivia and while the Supreme Court is located in Sucre, making it the judicial capital as well, the President and Congress still remain in La Paz making that city the seat of government. So now you know- and as GI Joe is so quick to point out, knowing is half the battle!

Give it up for the Plurinational State of Bolivia, kids- and remember, until next time, keep your flags flying- FREAK or otherwise!

Best of the Area 2013

Argh, why do I let myself get sucked into this every damn year!  Voting ends September 20th in the Press Citizen's Best of the Area and once again, I spent way, way too much time doing this.  The ballot is ridiculously long and some categories (like Banquet Facility) just made me laugh.  I mean, how many banquets do you have in any given year?

Best New Restaurant:  Brix   (I recognized none of the other restaurants in this category that's how new they were, so Brix wins by default.  I've been in there, it looks nice and the cheese we purchased was delicious.)

Overall Best Restaurant: Blackstone
Mexican Restaurant: La Michoacana Taqueria  (was a toss-up between this and Los Portales.  If there was a category for Best Margarita, Los Portales would obviously win.)

Coffee Shop: Caribou Coffee (Sparking Peach Black Tea FTW!)
Vegetarian Restaurant: Oasis
Italian: Baroncini  (If you haven't gone here yet, go here.  Perfect for a date night.)
Chinese:  Taste of China
Japanese: Oyama Sushi
Thai:  Thai Spice (I have dreams about moo pad prik thanks to Thai Spice.)
Indian: Exotic India (Oh, the vindaloo.  And the naan.  Winning!)
Steakhouse: Outback Steakhouse (because they were the last Steakhouse I went too around here.)
Fine Dining Restaurant: Baroncini
Family Friendly: Bob's Your Uncle  (I would have preferred to test this category with Little Man but what the hell- Bob's Your Uncle makes good pizza.)

Outdoor Dining: Atlas
Quick Casual Lunch: Z'Mariks (Buffalo Mac N'Cheese FOREVER.)
Pizza: The Wedge (Pagliai's, Wig and Pen, Airliner and Mesa were all in the mix.)
Ice Cream: Heyn's (Close by and The Cigarillo is a fan.)
FroYo: YoTopia (Naturally.)
Breakfast: Hamburg Inn No 2.  (Was tempted to go w/IHOP because they have chicken and waffles but their c & w is really chicken tenders and waffles.  Little but of a let down.)

Bakery: Molly's Cupcakes  (Until Scratch opens in Coralville!)
Burgers: Short's  (For barebones straight up burgers, George's can't be beat but Short's elevates the burger into awesomeness.  So I went with them.)

Fries: Oasis
Wings: The Vine
Tenderloin: Red's 
BBQ: Jimmy Jack's
Sushi: Oyama
Brunch: Blackstone  (never been but I bet it's good.)
Cocktail: Blackstone
Liquor Store: Hy-Vee Drug  (For pure beer, it's John's hands down.  Hy-Vee Drug has a better overall selection.)
Bar: Shakespeare's
Art Gallery: McNutt Gallery
Festival: Iowa Arts Festival
Live Entertainment:  The Mill
Theater:  Young Footliters
Caterer: John's
Banquet Facility: Coralville Marriot
Brewery: Backpocket Brewery
Fitness Center:  CRWC
Yoga: Downward Dog Yoga  (because I do oh so much Yoga)
Tattoo: Nemesis
Hair Salon: Zender's 
Barber Shop: Hawkeye Barber
Nail Salon: Modern Nails  (again, because I get my nails done all the time.)
Bank: US Bank
Car Dealership: Carousel
Auto Repair: White Dog
Auto Body Repair: Chuck Smith Body Shop
Doggie Day Care/Kennel: Lucky Pawz
Pet Store: PetCo
Vet: Bright Eyes and Bushy Tails
Women's Clothing: Revival
Men's Clothing: Ewers
Bookstore: Haunted Bookshop
Resale Shop: Ragstock
Gift Shop: AKAR
Jewelry: Hands
Music Shop: West Music
Optical: Eye Associates
Grocery Store: Hy-Vee
Outdoor Store: Fin and Feather
Hardware: Menards
Furniture: McGregor's
Appliance: The Appliance Barn
Flooring Store: Bachmeier
Garden Shop: Earl May
Home Décor: AKAR
Park: Terry Trueblood Recreation Area  (go check this place out if you haven't already!)
Bikeshop: World of Bikes
Golf: Finkbine
Dance Studio: Kate Carol
Martial Arts: Kang's Martial Arts

Whiskey of The Month #12: A Detour To Grappa, Part 1

The Cigar Parentals spent about six weeks in Italy this summer- Father Cigar was teaching at a summer program in northern Italy and they stayed in the town of Bassano Del Grappa, which, as you'd expect is one of the main grappa producing regions on Italy.  Naturally, I requested a bottle of grappa from Bassano Del Grappa- because, why wouldn't you?  It's like going to Cheddar in England and not having cheese. Or going to Bourbon County in Kentucky and not having some Bourbon.*   It's just one of those things that you gotta do.

And the Cigar Parentals, to their credit, came up big time and brought me back this:

The bottle is made out of Murano glass and it's beautiful.  It's like something out of a science lab and the deal is that I get to drink the contents of the bottle and the Missus gets to keep the bottle itself.  I think that's a deal where everybody walks away with a win.

Grappa is a brandy usually made out of pomace, which is a fancy way of saying that the stuff you have left over when you're making wine, you let ferment, distill and bam, grappa results.  (It can also result in other stuff too- but I don't think it's nearly as tasty.)   It can be pretty rough stuff- my first experience with grappa wasn't good.  It reminded me a lot of cheap tequila and smelled about as appetizing.  The Italians love the stuff though-  shot of grappa chased down by a shot of espresso seems to be the go-to way to kick start the day of many a commuter- at least that the story that the Cigar Parentals tell.  (Maybe I'll give it a shot- though I doubt the Starbucks espresso is going to be anywhere near as good as Italian espresso.)

Grappa is maturing though.  People are start to get serious about the distillation process and the grapes that they use and this particular grappa is grappa di prosecco-  so it's a lot smoother and there's some underlying sweetness to it that makes this smooth and very easy to drink.

Color:  clear- not even a hint of a tint!  Just like vodka.

Body: There's a subtle smokiness to the nose of this stuff but there's also an underlying sweetness that really does smell like grapes.   That's the main thing I take away-  breathe too deeply though and you'll singe your nose hairs.  This stuff has a kick to it.

Palate: Sits lightly on the tongue, the sweetness of the grape predominant until it gives way to a nice smokey, warming burn.

Finish: Beautiful.   That's really the only word I can use to describe this-  I have no idea what it was I drank in Italy a few years back but it was vile, vile stuff.  This is about as far away from that stuff as you could possible imagine and it warms you perfectly.  

*Shamefully, I have broken this 'rule' only once.  When we were visiting my godparents in Switzerland, we went up to Gruyére and while my parents wisely got some toasted ham and gruyére sandwiches for lunch, I opted with my brother for the culinary experience of eating at a McDonald's overseas instead.  If memory serves, there was something called the California Burger or something like that and the fries were awful.  My parents made the better choice- and it's a mistake of my youth I hope to rectify someday because as a cheese, gruyére is awesome.  And amazing with turkey breast for a grilled cheese if that's what you're craving.

Bookshot #68: The Right Kind of Wrong

Kara Pierce, a budding journalist with aspirations to be the next Katie Couric gets more than she bargained for when she's paired with Vince Gage for one final project before they graduate college.   Vince, a documentary filmmaker and Kara a tenancious intern at the Sacramento Bee have worked together before and have hated each other ever since.  But when a big story falls through at the Bee and Kara's relaxed and casual relationship suddenly ends, she surrenders to the inevitable and with a prestigious prize on the line, the duo have no choice but to figure out to work together.

After some initial disagreements, the two decide to focus their project, a documentary on Kara's grandfather who had fought in World War II.  Together, they hit the road, returning to the small Iowa town where Kara had grown up- and where she had left, intending to never look back.  Once back in Iowa, they find out that the story they thought they were telling was far more than they expected.   Kara is forced to confront secrets from her family's past and together with Vince, she hunts down the truth that's been hidden for decades, while at the same time confronting the truth that is growing in her own heart.

The Right Kind of Wrong is a strong and promising debut from Jade Eby and you get the sensation that the author only has more stories waiting to be told and that she can only get even better from here.   Eby's passion for her characters is obvious as she has created strong, believable, fully rounded characters across the board and her story is compelling enough to keep the reader eagerly turning the page throughout the book- which to me, is the mark of a great book.  If you can keep the reader turning the page, you've done something remarkable! (If you can add in great characters and an exciting story on top of that- which Eby does and then some, you've got a great book on your hands!)

Personally, I approached this novel with some trepidation.  This isn't a genre I usually read, so I was afraid that it 'just wouldn't be my thing.'  This novel surprised me and I surprised myself because I found myself invested in these characters and the story that they find themselves caught up in.  The chemistry and growing romance between Kara and Vince is handled in a deft and believable way- nothing about the relationship between the two of them feels forced or cliched.  The sights and sounds they discover in the tiny town of Everson, Iowa ring true- from the tator tot casserole that Kara's grandmother makes Kara and Vince to the insular nature of small towns and the secret that can be easily hidden.

If there was one thing I wished I knew more about, it's Kara's relationship with her father..  He remains off to the side of the main narrative for much of the book before suddenly being thrust into the action towards the end.   That seemed a little jarring to me at first but in the end, I think I realized that I just wanted to know more about him- and I suppose if a reader is left wanting to know more, then the author has done something very, very right.

Overall:  Having had the privilege of reading some very, very early chapters of this book, it's even more of a privilege to read the finished product and see for myself the staggering amount of passion and work that the author poured into this book.  What resulted was a wonderful trip into a genre that I doubt normally read with compelling characters and interesting story that kept me engaged and reading throughout.  With The Right Kind Of Wrong, what one hopes will be a long career in writing is off to a flying start.  **** out of ****

A Collapsing Souffle Of Rhetoric

So, let me get this straight:

We should bomb Syria because, if unchecked, the use of chemical weapons by the Assad regime will only encourage the proliferation and use of such weapons by regimes and potentially terrorists that are unfriendly to our interests.  The actions of the Assad regime are therefore, a threat to our national security.

But...  because it's not enough of an imminent threat to our national security, the President felt obligated to go to Congress to get approval for his actions because, America is stronger when we all act together.

Say what now?  I don't know about any of you who might happen to be reading this but that speech was flat out embarassing.  Right away, the President contradicted himself and then proceeded on a meandering path about how he would put no boots on the ground in Syria and we're all tired of war and we shouldn't be the world's policeman but the children!  The bodies!  The gas! And we're all going work with Russia and consult closely with our allies.  And oh by the way, I've withdrawn my request for a Congressional vote (because I was going to lose badly) to give this swell diplomacy thing time to work.

It was like watching a souffle full of soaring rhetoric slowly collapse in on itself and it was just painful, painful to sit through.   You can say a lot about Bush The Younger- god knows listening to that man massacre the English language was akin to get a root canal sometimes but at least you came away with some semblence of a policy.  You may not have agreed with his policy but at least you knew where the United States stood.  After that speech, I'm honestly not sure.

I feel like the time for an effective intervention in Syria was probably a year ago.  (And even then, I think putting boots on the ground would be idiotic.  A no-fly zone coupled with arms to rebel factions we like would have been helpful.  Now, reducing Assad's air defenses and air force to rubble may be what we settle for.)  Now things are too chaotic-  this Russian plan is swell and great but I have a feeling we're going to talk about this for a couple of weeks and then find out that it's totally untenable and be back at square one anyway.  When people like Pat Buchannan start thundering about us 'being Al-Qaeda's air force' and Glenn Beck starts pimping out some random YouTube video that shows a purported rebel eating the heart of a fallen Assad soldier ('We can't bomb Assad!  The Rebels are actually cannibal terrorists!  The horror!  The horror!)  they're not entirely wrong.

I'll be totally honest:  I have no idea what the President is waiting for.   This Russian plan sounds swell but really, it's totally untenable.  Maybe I'm wrong and something good will come of it- if that's the case, then great, but I think President Obama is going to spend the next two weeks to a month pissing into the wind and then end up bombing Syria anyway- when Assad's had a good month to bolster his air defenses and hide all the chemical weapons we're supposed to be destroying.

ICCSD Dome 2013: Nine Candidates Enter, Three Candidates Leave

I voted, did you?

Yes, it's Election Day in the race for Iowa City School Board and it's a nine candidate barnbuster and I honestly couldn't tell you what I think is going to happen- only that turnout is far outstripping the last School Board election and that there's an awful lot at stake this time around.

I sort of split my vote.  I went with Phil Hemingway and Jason T. Lewis as being my choices for a fresh perspective on the School Board.  Hemingway seems to have (along with Geerdes and Barron) won the endorsement of the Save Hoover people, which is sure to bring him plenty of votes on the East Side of town- though how deep his support is elsewhere, I don't know.  He's also refused to run a campaign and hasn't taken a cent in campaign money so mad props for that.

Jason T. Lewis was a late pick- mainly on the strength of this column in the Gazette that The Quiet Man was equally as impressed with. 

My final vote went to Karla Cook.  As a retired teacher from the district, I think it's valuable to have her voice on the board so she can add the perspective of the people in the trenches, so to speak- plus, she was one of the few math teachers that managed to get a lick of algebra to stick in my head, so I can testify that when she was teaching, she was damn good at it.

I wasn't actually aware that there were two bond issues on the ballot as well, so I scanned 'em quickly and voted YES on both.   I think the School District has made a good start with their expansion plans and I'd like see Hoover saved and the plans for the new elementary schools and a new high school carried forward as we go.  If we're not going to save Hoover, it's imperative that the community know why.  If you're going to tear it down for parking space, that should be the walking, talking, living, breathing definition of unacceptable.  (I also think the new joint venture STEM Center with Kirkwood and the University being planned for out at Oakdale is brilliant and should go through as well.)

Either way, it's game on for the School District.

UPDATED- 7:06 PM:  With a litle under an hour before polls closed, this came across my Twitter feed:

5608 votes have been casted as of 6pm. The record number is 5812 votes. That was in 1995.
— The Little Hawk (@thelittlehawk) September">https://twitter.com/thelittlehawk/statuses/377579344488833024">September 10, 2013

Just a reminder, if you're in line at 8PM, you can still vote!  This could be a long night.

UPDATED- 8:51 PM:  Well, looks like unofficial results are in and it's Dorau, Kirshling and Lynch.  Who the heck is Lynch?  I'm not really sure--  I don't even think I look that far down on the ballot.  Looks like both ballot measures are going to pass as well.

So if the results hold, I struck out on Lewis, Hemingway and Cook...  and it looks as though the Save Hoover folks had a bad night as well:  Geerdes, Hemingway and Barron all went down.   I'll reiterate again:  if we're going to do something as back asswards sounding as closing down a school to build two new ones, people should know what we're going to use the space for.  If the Board doesn't have a plan, they should get one and sell it to the community because people should know what we're closing schools for.

Looking at the vote tallies over here though, this might not be 100% over yet:  the Gazette has a ridiculous three vote margin separating Hemingway and Lynch.   Stay tuned, I guess.

UPDATED- 9:21 PM:  So much for a close race, they've officially called it for Kirshling, Dorau and Lynch. Hemingway on the outside looking in, again.

UPDATED- 10:21 PM:  Final thought- and a random one at that:  Props to The Little Hawk for being all over Twitter on this tonight.   Think they've been the most informative election coverage of the night so far.  (And if you Tweet, they're @thelittlehawk)

Iowa vs. Missouri State: veni, vidi, frustra obtinuit

Saturday I did something I hadn't done in a very, very long time:  I actually went to an Iowa football game as a spectator.   Long ago, in the far distant past Father Cigar actually got season tickets for a few years until it became clear that my sisters were totally disinterested in football and I, being a young man, suffered through one too many frigid Minnesota games in November and became more interested in staying warm and running around and reading books than football (this was before my brother came along, if I remember correctly.)  After that, I didn't really start to get into football until high school and then I spent college covering Saturday shifts down at the Art Museum because I didn't have tickets to the games and after that, I ended up working the games.

So, it had been a long-ass time.  How long?  Well, the last time I remember going to a game at Kinnick, Matt Sherman was quarterback and I have no idea what was going on that game but people were not happy with him.

All in all though, it was a great experience.   We lucked out and got nosebleed tickets in the South Endzone which turned out to be a blessing in disguise, because thanks to the enormous new jumbotron, we were in the shade the entire time.  I can't imagine what it would have been like to sit out in the sun because it turned into a blisteringly sticky and hot day.   The view was great, the wind whirled through now and again and it was a pretty nice place to sit and watch the Hawkeyes play.

I was optimistic going into this game.  Yes, losing to Northern Illinois stung.  But given the inexperience of our quarterback, I felt like things could have been a lot worse than they actually were- and the first half was a pleasant surprise, both in terms of offense production and points so I was hoping for four quarters of a similar experience with this game.

Nope.  Instead, the first half was plagued by dropped passes and although we were moving the ball, we weren't finishing drives.  Rudock, I continue to like.  He's got poise, moves well in the pocket and showed a couple of times during this game that he can run if he has too.   I think if we're going to continue to move the ball east to west, it'd be nice to see some variety in play calling.  I kept thinking throughout the game, 'man, they should throw a reverse at them.'  (Really, it'd be nice to get people over the middle for passes and the occasional threat downfield for Rudock, but if we're going to see a flea flicker now and again, I think a reverse could be a nice curveball as a posed to curl routes and slants to the outside.  If you wanted to get really crazy, you could try a double reverse.)

The first half was pretty dismal but they came out the second half swinging and start putting points on the board and apart from a brief period at the end of the third quarter where Missouri State threatened to make game of it (a pick six and a TD brought the game to 21-14 going into the 4th) the defense held on and the offense put one more touchdown on the board to ice the game and pick up the win.

The fan commentary around me was less than pleased.*  People seemed frustrated because they were expecting a shit-stomping blowout and didn't get one and I could understand their frustration a little bit. The first half of this game seemed to be a reversion to the more pedestrian, plodding ways of last year.  The offensive tempo was non-existant and the pace was slower than it had been against Northern Illinois.  A lot of this was rectified in the second half but the swinging pendulum was frustrating to see, yet in the end it produced a win so it was hard to argue against.  I think if we're going to really use no-huddle, we should pick up the pace even more than we are.  Don't get me wrong:  after last year, it's beyond refreshing to see that the offense can move the ball.   But the defenses we've played thus far haven't been Big Ten caliber and we had a lot of trouble getting points on the board.  You could be pleased with 80-90 plays and 300-400 yards of offense a game but you could also be forgiven if you say, 'veni, vedi, frustra obtinuit.'  I came, I saw, I got frustrated.

*Some idiot was also moaning about the 18K cops ruining the experience for the students and 'that's why they didn't show up.'  First of all- I was pretty impressed because really and truly, I saw six cops in my general vicinity the whole game.  2 at the gate and 4 that came wandering up to our section to either get some shade or check things out.   Given what I know about the effort and the amount of manpower local agencies provide to make games safe and secure for everyone, the footprint was remarkable for how light it was.  Apart from when they took the field at the end, I could hardly tell that there were cops at the Stadium at all.  Second of all-  the students are fickle, that's why they didn't show up.  They got spoiled by success (as a lot of other fans have) and don't remember too many lean years.  I remember being excited by trips to the Sun Bowl and beating Iowa State.  But I also remember going to the Rose Bowl in 1991.  OK, we lost but we got there at least.  

40 For 40

Well, I almost made the 50% mark for my 30 For 30 List but this since I'm entering a new decade, I thought a new list was in order.  I liked the concept of the old list and I like the idea of the new list because I think I'm slowly becoming a list person- I get a great deal of satisfaction when I cross things off a list and this will be no exception.

This year, it's different though.  It's not just me and the Missus anymore- there's The Cigarillo to consider as well, so while some of these things may seem a little extreme right now at this second, keep in mind that I've got a whole decade to get this stuff done- and I'm willing to compromise on some of this stuff as well.  Maybe that trip to India can wait until retirement!

But I did try and keep my expectations and goals realistic- probably a bit too late at this point to become an astronaut or start a political party to take down the two party corporate duopoly that seems to be hell bent on running the country into the ground.  (Though the jury is still out on that latter thought.  I'd certainly give freely of my time and money to any political party I thought had a lick of sense in their head.  I'm still waiting.)  Anyway, the point is, these are things that can, maybe with a little patience, perserverance and thriftiness with the cash moneys be accomplished.

Since I've got a longer time period, I've got some new rules for this list:  updates will be posted once a year on my birthday and I can review the list when I turn 35 to see if there are any goals I'd want to change or alter in any way.  As you'll probably notice, I footnoted the shit out of this list as well. Enjoy!

1.  Publish My Novel
2. Get Another Tattoo (maybe work on a sleeve depending on the results of #6)
3.  Finish All 4,532 pages and 12 volumes of Winston Churchill's 'The Second World War.'
4.  Run a 5K  (to start with.  I'd also like to complete that 2,906 mile challenge I set myself and if I can run a 5K without dying, a 10K, Half Marathon and even a Marathon also seem like possibilities- but let's not get ahead of ourselves here.)

5. Visit All 50 States
6. Get ripped and get myself in shape.*
7. Pay off every single dime of my student loans.
8.  Write more novels, publish them.
9. I would like to ride a mechanical bull.
10. Go on a Caribbean Cruise with the Missus (through the Panama Canal and other destinations.)

11.  Call me crazy, but I think I'd like to drive to Alaska- maybe on a family vacation.  Just cuz. 

12.  People keep insisting to me that St. Louis and Kansas City are pretty cool once you get to know them.  Figure out if this is true or not.

13.  Have at least one culinary adventure a year.**
14. Vikings/Packers at Lambeau.  'Nuff said.
15.  Read one fiction book a year that's well outside my usual genre preferences.

16.  Work on my backlog of non-fiction and history books--  my Frasier biographies of Charles II and Cromwell, The Steel Bonnets and my Jenkins bios of Churchill and Gladstone are at the top of the list.

17. Read Wuthering Heights and understand/appreciate it.
18. Re-read and finish The Wheel of Time and A Song of Ice and Fire
19.  Read Pride and Prejudice and understand it.  (Or at least appreciate it.)
20.  Master my ukulele!  (Even take lessons from someone if I have too.)
21.  I would like to shoot a gun.  Because I've never done that before.
22. Be the best Father I can be.***
23.  Be able to buy a really rare bottle of whiskey for my 40th Birthday.
24.  I'd like to visit Kentucky and check out the Bourbon Trail.
25.  I'd like to visit NYC.
26.  Ride a day of RAGBRAI
27.  Ride the whole week of RAGBRAI
28. Learn how to make bread from scratch
29.  World Travel Wishlist:  Brazil, India, China, Europe
30.  Brush up my foreign language skills and achieve moderate fluency in Chinese and Hindi.
31.  Get something pierced again.  (I really, really missed my piercings.)
32.  Go skydiving
33.  Go to Trekfest  (no excuses next year!  Gotta get this done or turn in my Trekker Card)
34.  Take the family back to the United Kingdom for a vacation.
35.  Make Our House Perfect (or move to a bigger and better house)
36.  Be able to afford a subscription to The Economist
37. Road Trip it up to Winnipeg for a Jets Game
38.  I'd like to see an Iowa away game somewhere.  (Football and basketball.)
39.  Go To A Major League Soccer Game
40.  Go to a Cubs Game at Wrigley

*Basically, it'd be nice to have some tone.  Maybe a hint of a six pack on my abs.  Even if it's just for a minute or so.

**At home or at a restaurant, I want to eat and or cook delicious, interesting food.

***This is kind of abstract, I think but it's still an important goal, especially as I'd imagine our family is only going to grow.

30 For 30: The Final Results

Well, I almost hit 50%.   Final tally has me at 40%, which given the fact I only had a couple of years to do all this really doesn't seem that bad to me.  Stay tuned tomorrow for the debut of 40 For 40.

1. Finish My Novel
2. Get Another Tattoo
3. Publish My Novel (conventionally would be preferred, but I might be open to Kindle.)
4. Get Something Pierced Again... (I'm thinking labret. Thoughts anyone?)
5. Get Contacts Again (Eye appointment on Monday! Hopefully this will be done SOON.)
6. Go Skydiving
7. Go to a Twins Game
8. Let's keep our hockey expectations grounded: Roughriders, Mavericks or Gophers game.
9. Visit All 50 States (or failing all 50, get to the lower 48 at least.)
10. Lose 30 to 40 pounds... (whatever gets me back down to the 190-200 range- and maintain it!)
11. Run a 5k
12. Attend Trekfest! (Something I've never done, despite being a fan of Star Trek!)
13. Go to a Music Festival... (either 80/35 or Lollapalooza? Farm Aid?)
14. Attend the Iowa Caucuses. (I've never actually done this. I did it in Minnesota, but not Iowa.)
15. Finish all 4,532 pages (and 12 volumes) of Winston Churchill's 'The Second World War'
16. Read something by Faulkner- and understand it.
17. Re-read The Catcher in the Rye and The Great Gatsby- and try and appreciate them.
18. Read 'Dune' and understand it... (or kind of enjoy it, maybe?)
19. I'd like to see an Iowa away game somewhere.
20. Attend a Major League Soccer game.
21. Attend a Civil War Re-Enactment/Commemorations of the 150th Anniversary of the War
22. Expand our backyard patio, put in a pergola and a fire pit
23. Finish off our bathroom, re-floor and repaint our master bedroom
24. Go back to Europe- Spain, Portugal, England, Ireland, Scotland, France, Greece and Cyprus are all on my wish list.
25. Become a father- I know this is dependent on any number of factors beyond my control, but I think trying should be a lot of fun... ;-)

26. Learn How To Make Bread from Scratch
27. Become a good amateur bartender
28. I'd like to take my wife on a real honeymoon
29. Improve my foreign language skills
30. I'd like to save up and get a subscription to The Economist. Probably the best news magazine out there.